Posts in Self-improvement
Reducing Conflicts with the THINK Skill

Do you find it difficult to work things out with others, but you’re not sure why? Often times, when we are interacting with others—particularly when we are disagreeing or arguing with someone else—we approach the situation with a negative mindset. Our brains naturally interpret the other person’s words and actions as negative or threatening. As a result, we jump to conclusions, quickly lash out, and become hostile or defensive. Our emotions (like anger and frustration) can take control of our actions during these situations. This clearly is not acting in an effective manner, especially if your goal is to improve your relationships and communicate in a more healthy way with others. Luckily, there’s a DBT skill which you can employ to reduce disagreements. Use the THINK skill to move from an Emotion Minded place into Wise Mind, where you are able to solve conflicts more effectively. Here’s how it works…

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Quick and Simple Self-Care Strategies

When life gets hectic, how do you practice self-care? Do you feel like there's not enough time in the day to do so? It may feel like you can't take time to de-stress because of all of the “to-do's” of the day or week. But when you neglect practicing self-care, you may feel run down or burnt out. It can certainly impact your emotional and physical well-being. Here are some easy ways to practice self-care in order to feel more refreshed, present, and productive.

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Learning About DBT

Have you ever heard of DBT? DBT is short for Dialectical Behavior Therapy, an evidence-based therapy that integrates Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) with Eastern mindfulness practices. DBT is proven effective in helping people develop coping skills, reduce self-harm behaviors and improve negative patterns of thinking. It is validating and empowering as it helps people learn and apply skills to manage strong emotions and urges. Discover more about DBT here…

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How to Avoid Being Reactive

Does your teen feel overwhelmed and emotionally drained? Does your child feel like he or she doesn't have control over his or her life? One key strategy to combat these feelings is to avoid being reactive. When we are reactive, we allow events and other people to dictate how we react. We passively respond to what's going on and we struggle to keep up with life's demands. Whether it’s anger, anxiety, or sadness, our emotions can sometimes manage our actions without us even realizing it. Therefore, we must take responsibility for our actions. We must take a proactive approach, rather than a reactive one. By taking ownership of how we act, we decide what we will do—not the other way around. Here’s how you can be proactive, not reactive…

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How to Take a Brief Vacation

Life always pushes and pulls us in many directions. Between work, school, kids, friends, family, obligations to the community, etc, it’s hard to find the time to slow down in both body and mind. Do you ever feel so distressed that you have to leave the environment that’s making you stressed? By briefly removing yourself from an overwhelming environment or activity, you tend to feel better. You may not realize it, but you’re employing a DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) skill called “brief vacation.” Let’s explore how it works…

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Setting Healthy Boundaries

We all have boundaries, or limits that we establish for ourselves. Setting boundaries is the way we communicate what is okay and what is not okay in our relationships and friendships. Knowing what your boundaries are and what you are comfortable with in your life is very important for your safety and your self-respect. If you know what you are okay with, then you know to speak your mind when you don’t want to engage in something or with someone that creates uncertainty. You can assert your boundaries in a number of different ways. Here are a few examples…

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Practicing Kindness

Have you heard of the saying "A little bit of kindness goes a long way"? It's more than just an expression—it's actually true! Science proves that performing acts of kindness is beneficial for all of the people involved. It reduces anxiety, makes you feel calmer, and increases happiness too. Why not do your part to be kindhearted towards others? Try performing one random act of kindness each day. It can be something big or small—whatever you choose. Are you ready to take this challenge? We’ve got some suggestions to get you started…

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Practicing Forgiveness

Do you sometimes find it difficult to forgive other people? The ability to forgive is an important component for our own personal growth and happiness. Holding on to hurt, pain, resentment, and anger harms us far more than it harms the offender. We should all strive to better forgive others, as well as ourselves. Let’s clarify what forgiveness involves, and explore why it’s beneficial to practice forgiveness…

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Tips for Sticking to Your New Year's Resolution

Everyone sets goals for the New Year, so that we can have a better, healthier year ahead. How are you doing with your resolutions so far? Whether you’re trying to lose weight, get more sleep each night, or spend more time with family, it can be difficult to stick to your resolutions. Use these tips to help stick to your goals for 2019…

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Eating Disorder vs. Disordered Eating: How to Tell the Difference

Do you have a difficult or out-of-control relationship with food? You may potentially have an eating disorder, or it could be disordered eating. It’s often difficult for people to determine if or when their disordered eating habits develop into an eating disorder. Many wonder, “How do I know it’s really a problem?” Disordered eating habits are fairly common. Perhaps you eat when you are bored or upset (you may not actually be hungry at the time), or you eat the same thing for breakfast each morning. Disordered eating behaviors can be precursors to more alarming behaviors that fall into the “eating disorder” realm. However, you can engage in disordered eating without having a more serious eating disorder. Read more about some key differences between the two...

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Self-Soothe to Reduce Holiday Stress

Can you believe that it’s already the holiday season? With the kids home from school, travel plans, gift-giving, and meal preparation, your week off can quickly become a very stressful time of year. Don’t let the holiday stress get you down. To avoid feeling overwhelmed, try using a skill called Self-Soothe. Self-soothe encourages you to relax and improve your mood through your five senses. You can comfort yourself, giving yourself the mental health break that you deserve this holiday season…

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5 DBT Skills That You're Already Using

Have you just started working with a DBT therapist or have you recently joined a DBT Therapy Group? If so, you may be anxious about learning a whole new set of coping skills. The good news is that you are most likely using some DBT skills on a regular basis. You may not even realize that you are applying these skills regularly. It is helpful to review the skills, so that you can be aware of when you’re utilizing them and then use them most effectively. Here is an overview of five DBT skills that you may already be using…

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Managing Family Expectations this Holiday Season

Can you believe that the holiday season has already started? The holidays are a time for family, spirituality, personal reflection, gift-giving, travel, food, and so much more. It’s a wonderful time of year, but it’s also a stressful one. We envision an idealistic family gathering or holiday party, even though we know that this is not realistic. Many of us put too much pressure on ourselves to have the perfect holiday experience. While the “perfect” holiday may not exist, you can use the following strategies to make the most of this holiday season…

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The Importance of Mindfulness

The practice of mindfulness has surged in popularity over the last few years—and for very good reasons. Unfortunately, some people are still uninformed or confused about exactly why it is beneficial to incorporate mindfulness techniques into their lives. Are you wondering what all the buzz is about? Read on for some reasons why leading a more mindful life can have far-reaching positive effects…

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What to Expect in your First Therapy Session

Starting therapy for the first time can be nerve-racking for anyone. It’s a new experience that may push you outside of your comfort zone. At the same time, it’s a proven way to help you learn more about yourself and grow. First, be proud of yourself for having the courage to make yourself an appointment. Next, read about how people feel about therapy, and what typically occurs during a first appointment from the therapists at Mindsoother. We’re here to reassure you that you can take the first step towards self-improvement…

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5 Ways for Moms to De-Stress

Do you ever feel like no matter how much you do during the day, it still isn't enough? When you have kids, (especially small children) you likely find yourself doing everything for them—from feeding, to bathing, to carpooling and more. The days can start to feel like they blend together. You also may notice that finding time for yourself is becoming a rarity. Whether you are a mom to a newborn or a mom of three, it's easy to let stress build up. If you’re looking for some tips to relax and finally have some time to yourself, then here are 5 ways for moms to de-stress…

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Break the Bad Habit of Negative Thinking

Do you ever go into a situation thinking that things will go badly, and then they actually do? How does that happen? It’s likely because of a concept called a self-fulfilling prophecy. A self-fulfilling prophecy is a prediction bound to become true as a result of behavior caused by its being expressed. Essentially, how you think determines your end result. If you believe that things won’t go well, they likely won’t go well. So how can you stop this vicious cycle of self-fulfilling prophecies? Here are some tips to help you break the habit…

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How to Tell if You’re in an Unhealthy or Abusive Relationship

We start new relationships with a romantic partner or with a friend for various reasons. We want to enjoy each other’s company, feel happy, learn new things, feel close to someone, and share exciting parts of our lives. However, sometimes these relationships feel like a lot of work; they may end up taking more from our lives then they are giving. If you feel the strain of your relationship, it’s important to step back and understand if the relationship is unhealthy or potentially abusive. Use this resource to spot the differences between a healthy, an unhealthy, and an abusive relationship…

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How to Live Mindfully

Sometimes, we find ourselves focusing on the “would have,” “could have” and “should have’s” of life. We contemplate our past actions or worry about the future. Maybe it’s time to put those thoughts aside and take action. What can you do? Consider living “mindfully” instead. Living mindfully is the practice of allowing yourself to be in an awake and present-minded state. Research supports that living mindfully increases a person’s well-being, happiness and satisfaction with life. Here are a few tips on how live mindfully….

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4 Common Habits that may Drain your Energy

In today's world, many of us feel like there aren't enough hours in the day to get everything done. There are so many things to do, but we don’t have enough time or energy to complete them. Life can feel even more challenging due to habits that we don’t even realize are depleting our energy. Here are some common habits that can make day-to-day life more difficult than it needs to be…

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