Building Flexibility: How to Help Kids Navigate Unexpected Changes

Change is an inevitable part of life. For some children, especially those with autism, anxiety, and other executive functioning deficits, unexpected events can pose significant challenges. Unexpected changes can leave kids who rely heavily on predictable routines and structured environments to feel secure and calm feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and uncertain, impacting both their daily lives and social interactions.

Thankfully, there are effective strategies parents and caregivers can use to help children build flexibility, reduce anxiety, and navigate life's unpredictable moments with greater confidence.

Effective Strategies for Increasing Flexibility

1. Use Visual Supports and Visual Schedules

Visual aids are incredibly beneficial for children with executive functioning deficits. Visual schedules clearly outline daily activities which help your child anticipate what's next, reduce anxiety, and enhance their sense of security. Incorporating a "change" card or symbol can gradually help your child become more comfortable with minor adjustments in the routine.

2. Create a Supportive Environment

A structured environment—one that includes familiar items, comforting spaces, and calming sensory tools—helps your child feel secure amidst uncertainty. Establishing specific calming areas in your home or classroom provides a reassuring space your child can retreat to when feeling overwhelmed.

3. Cope Ahead

Coping ahead is a DBT skill designed to prepare for potentially stressful situations. Coping ahead involves describing the situation, potential triggers, and ways to cope in detail. Picturing themselves effectively coping with a stressful situation can significantly improve your child’s ability to handle unexpected changes by providing clarity and reducing anxiety about unfamiliar situations.

4. Practice Role-Playing

Role-playing helps children navigate social interactions and unexpected scenarios by rehearsing various responses in a controlled setting. Practicing potential situations beforehand equips your child with strategies and confidence, making them less likely to feel overwhelmed during real-life changes.

5. Encourage the Use of Fidget Toys

Fidget toys provide a beneficial sensory outlet, helping kids stay calm and focused, especially during times of stress or unexpected change. These small tools—such as stress balls, fidget spinners, or textured objects—can soothe anxiety, reduce sensory overload, and provide a tangible source of comfort during disruptions.

6. Teach Calming Techniques: Deep Breaths and Mindfulness

Introducing simple calming techniques, such as deep breaths or mindfulness exercises, can significantly help children manage anxiety that may be caused by unexpected changes. Practicing deep breathing together during calm moments builds familiarity, enabling your child to use these tools effectively when feeling overwhelmed.

7. Gradually Introduce Small Changes

Slowly and intentionally introducing minor variations into daily routines can gently increase your child's tolerance for change. Starting small—such as varying the order of tasks or occasionally changing planned activities—helps your child build resilience incrementally, enhancing their flexibility over time.

Building flexibility is a gradual process requiring patience, consistency, and encouragement. Recognizing and celebrating small victories helps reinforce your child's progress and boosts their confidence. Positive reinforcement and continuous support reassure your child that navigating changes successfully is achievable and rewarding. Helping your child build flexibility means equipping them with essential life skills to confidently navigate unexpected changes. 

Mindsoother is excited to announce that we will soon be introducing a new executive functioning curriculum, open to all ages, designed to your child’s ability build the skills they need to successfully navigate change and improve flexibility. If your child or teen is struggling with executive functioning skills, contact Mindsoother today.

Together, we’ll equip them with practical strategies that foster confidence, independence, and long-term success.