Teaching Kids to be Smart about Social Media
As parents, it’s normal to feel a little uneasy about our kids using social media for the first time. We’re well aware of the negative consequences of social media use, and we want to make sure that our children use it safely. Whether we like it or not, social media isn’t going anywhere. Apps like Snapchat, Instagram, and Twitter have become platforms for socialization and exploration. Luckily, there are positive aspects to responsible social media usage as well. Let’s explore how social media can be beneficial and how to guide your child into appropriate social media usage…
When used effectively, social media can have a positive impact on your child. As your child begins to use social media, encourage him/her to navigate social platforms mindfully, use them in moderation, and be respectful and supportive online. The goal is to establish healthy and responsible behavior regarding social media early on. That way, he or she can reap the benefits of positive social media usage, such as:
Access to communities that help teens feel connected with peers
Opportunities for more introverted kids to form friendships, and later transfer them into “real life” interactions
Exposure to “positive peer pressure,” which encourages teens to do something positive
Access to platforms for shared interests and activism
Boosts self-esteem (from positive comments and words of encouragement from others)
When allowing your teen or tween to use social media for the first time, keep in mind that there is not a right or wrong approach. There are many thoughtful ways to introduce your son or daughter to online platforms. You may want to think about it like learning to drive a car—you wouldn’t just hand over the keys and say “go for it.” You would teach your child to drive gradually, beginning with a responsible adult in the car as co-pilot, and working towards your child’s independence with driving. Once he or she understands the rules of driving and has thoroughly practiced, then he or she gains the privilege of driving alone. A similar process can apply to social media. Just like with driving a car, you can guide your child with navigating social media safely. Here are some approaches to consider:
When you feel that your child is of appropriate age, allow your child to make an account for the app on your phone (and only your phone). Keep in mind that every child is different; you know your son or daughter best, and you have the right to determine when your child is ready. You might introduce your child to social media by allowing him or her to use his or her Instagram account on your phone. This way, you have access to his or her account (which you should NOT check all of the time) and you can monitor and limit how much social media time your child gets.
It’s okay to periodically check your teen or tween’s accounts at first. It will open up opportunity for conversations on how his or her friends use social media. It will also help you become more comfortable with how kids use social media for connection and communication.
Eventually, once you feel your child is using social media responsibly, allow him or her to download and use the app on his or her own phone. Certain rules and periodic checking can still apply. Over time, you will trust your child’s judgment enough to taper off with checking.
Social media is part of our lives; whether we like it or not, it will likely be part of our children’s lives as well. Luckily, introducing your child to social media is entirely up to you. As a parent, you know your child best. If you don’t think he or she is mature enough for it yet, then don’t allow it. It’s okay to wait until you feel your child is responsible enough for it. However, you’ll find that a majority of the content your child engages with involves kids doing developmentally awkward things as they try to figure out who they are. Social media isn’t as bad as it seems—there are some positive aspects to it as well. You can teach your child to use social media safely and mindfully, so that he or she gets the most out of the experience.