Setting expectations for your child is meant to be helpful. But, when is it harmful? Similar to a tightrope, expectations can be tricky to navigate and acrobats (in this case, your child) often require the perfect combination of skill, training, and coaching to be able to successfully get across. So when you set expectations for your child you should consider whether or not you are setting your child up to succeed (meet the expectations) or fail (not meet the expectations).
Read MoreSeeing your child struggle may be one of the most difficult things to experience as a parent. Whether it’s watching them fall down at the playground or reading their rejection letter from their top choice college, it’s equally painful to witness. As a parent, your instinct is to fix your child’s problem or soothe their pain as quickly as possible. But what if the distress you’re feeling is more about your own discomfort than your child’s? The secret to being a supportive parent is helping your child without enabling them. Where do you draw the line between being there for your kid and doing the hard work for your kid? And how do you manage the stress that comes along with this? Here are some helpful tips…
Read MoreDid you know that anyone can be misgendered? You don’t have to be trans to be referred to as the wrong gender or talked about with the wrong pronouns. However, trans people are common recipients of misgendering. Misgendering trans people can have very negative effects. You may not even realize you are hurting your trans child when you do this. Using new pronouns and a new name can be hard to adjust to, especially when it is someone you’ve known all of their life. However, it is important to put in that extra effort and correct your mistakes. Here’s why it’s important to be mindful about pronouns and what you can do to make the switch more seamless…
Read MoreAs a parent, validation is key. You’ve probably heard parenting experts use the term to help you connect with your child. But what does validation really mean? How does it work? And what does it look like when put to practice? Here’s everything you need to know about validation, and how it can become your most powerful parenting tool…
Read MoreDoes your child struggle with falling asleep? Now that we’ve set the clocks back, is getting a good night’s rest nearly impossible for your kid or teen? Your child is not alone. Many kids have trouble falling and staying asleep. And it’s understandably frustrating for parents because it often feels like there’s nothing you can do to get them to sleep better. While it may feel like your child’s quality of sleep is out of your control, it turns out that it’s not. Prepare your child for a better night’s rest with these helpful tips…
Read MoreIt’s natural—we don’t want our kids to fail. When we see them struggling, our instincts tell us to jump in before they reach danger, whether it’s real danger or perceived. We give our children advice and intervene when we think they are making the “wrong” decisions. However, the truth is that even though seeing our kids fail is hard, it is important to let them do so. Failure will make them stronger, as difficult as it is to witness. Here are some reasons why we should consider taking a step back…
Read MoreWhen your children act up or misbehave, what do you do? Do you immediately react with a harsh “Stop it right now!” or do you pause and ask yourself “Why are they feeling upset?” It’s normal to take the first approach; in fact, it’s instinctive. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always lead to the best results. Reacting to your child’s maladaptive behaviors can sometimes fuel their intense emotions instead of cooling them. While there isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, there are ways to reduce stress and help your children grow. One option is conscious parenting. What is conscious parenting and how can you put it to practice? We’ll explain…
Read MoreIf your child is struggling with an eating disorder or working through their recovery journey, you may have noticed that meal times can be a huge stressor. People recovering from eating disorders have to directly challenge their disordered thoughts and feelings several times a day during every meal. This can be especially difficult for kids and teens. Unfortunately, there is no way to avoid it; we need to eat in order to survive. However as a parent, you can make meal time a bit easier for your child. You can create a nurturing environment for recovery while helping your child build distress tolerance. Here are some do’s and don’t’s for meal time…
Read MoreGive yourself a pat on the back for getting your child to come see a therapist! It’s no easy feat to get your child to work through their challenges—like trouble with self-esteem, behavioral issues, and school-related struggles, to name a few. So, you got them in the door… now what? How can you help your child “get better”? Is there something you can do to help them through the process? The short answer is yes! Here are some steps you can take to support your child through therapy…
Read MoreDo you find yourself in constant conflict with your teen? It may likely start with your child talking back or acting up, and it only escalates from there. It’s not uncommon for this to happen, and it’s certainly not pleasant either. Luckily, there are ways to avoid communication breakdowns and emotional meltdowns. By being mindful, keeping your emotions in check, and implementing DBT skills, you can deal with your teen’s back talk more effectively. Here are some tips to navigate conflict with your teen without facing an emotional rollercoaster….
Read MoreDoes your child feel pressured by perfectionism? Do they do everything they can to get perfect grades, memorize all of their lines in the school play, or score for their team in every sports game? Whether we realize it or not, we tend to feed into our children’s desire to be perfect in a certain aspect of life or to know exactly what they are going to do when they grow up. Perfectionist tendencies can have a series impact on your child’s mental health. In extreme cases, this can lead to things such as anxiety, depression and eating disorders. How can you help your child find balance in their life while encouraging them to do their best? Here are some tips…
Read MoreMany parents wonder, “When is the right time to have a talk around substance abuse with my child?” The time to have this challenging discussion will vary for each child; there isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach. Instead, it’s best to be proactive. Your child’s risk for exposure to substance use will increase as they reach their early teen years. And it’s not a matter of if they get exposed to substances; it’s a matter of when it happens. So once you determine the right time to talk to your child, what do you do next? What do you talk about, and how do you remain a source of support that your child can reach out to with any questions or concerns down the road? How can you most effectively navigate the conversation around substance use? Here are some tips to help you get things started…
Read MoreDoes your child struggle to manage their anger? Do they spiral into fits of anger, with seemingly no way to get through it? Anger is an emotion typically gets a bad reputation because it’s uncomfortable to cope with—especially for kids and teens. But chances are that your child has had their share of “tantrums” without knowing how to respond. We need to help our children understand that it’s normal to be angry at times; it’s part of the variety of emotions they’ll experience in life. It’s what they do with those feelings that matters. Here are some ways to help your pre-teen or teenager understand and cope with anger…
Read MoreDo you find yourself telling your teen to look on the bright side? Or telling them that other people have it worse, so they should focus on the good things that they have? Without knowing it, you may be contributing to what’s known as “toxic positivity.” What is toxic positivity, and how could it have an impact on yourself and your family’s mental health? What can you do as a parent to reduce toxic positivity and encourage an open dialogue with your teen about their emotions? Let’s explore…
Read MoreIf your child comes to you to have a conversation about them being gay or queer, it can be tempting to think of this as just a phase—something that is a growing fad as we see more and more teenagers coming out as queer nowadays. However, most likely this isn’t a phase; this is likely the beginning of the process of your child figuring out their identity. According to a study at William’s Institute, about 9.5% of youth in America, or roughly 1,994,000 teenagers from ages 13 to 17, identify as LGBTQ+. It’s likely that your teen is going to have a friend who is part of the LGBTQ+ community or that they will identify as part of it themselves. Fortunately, the world is a more accepting place than it was just a decade ago, and this can allow LGBTQ+ youth to feel more comfortable identifying as queer. Here are some parenting tips to help you be supportive of your newly out or questioning teen….
Read MoreBullying is an all too common problem amongst our kids—and unfortunately, it’s an issue that adults don’t find out about until later on. Only 46% of students report bullying to an adult. Some kids may feel afraid to “tell on” the bullies, and others may be ashamed that they’re the victim of this harassment. So how can we keep our kids safe and encourage a healthy conversation about bullying? How can we encourage our children to keep coming back to us to discuss difficult topics? Here are some tips to help you navigate the conversation if your child comes to you about it…
Read MoreDepression in teens can often be overlooked or written off as “moodiness” by their parents. While some teens will simply experience mood swings or struggle with other problems that come with growing up, others may be dealing with something more serious like depression. If depression-like symptoms persist, it is worth giving a second look and potentially following up with a mental health professional. Everyone also knows of the usual sadness that is associated with depression, but there are other physical, mental, and emotional symptoms that can occur due to depression. Here are some signs of depression that your teen may be exhibiting…
Read MoreUnfortunately, self-harm is on the rise. 15% of teens and 17-35% of young adults and college-students self-harm, according to recent data. While it can be difficult to talk about, it’s important to create an open dialogue to talk about self-harm and self-injury with your teen or young adult. Having a safe space to discuss this topic, as well as mental health in general, can help you and your young adult deal with this important issue and get treatment, if needed. How do you begin this conversation? And what should the discussion about self-harm look like? Here’s everything you need to know to get the conversation started…
Read MoreYour child is growing up. They just got back from the DMV with a glowing smile and a (most likely) unflattering photo. While you are excited for them and their newfound freedom, it’s just as fair for you to feel scared about what this freedom and responsibility means. Parenting a new driver comes with many questions: How much freedom do they have, now that they can drive themselves without your supervision? How can you make sure that they are safe? How will they handle this new responsibility? Here are some tips for navigating this new stage…
Read MoreParenting can be a roller coaster of a ride. As a parent, you’re there for all the tantrums, the proud smiles, the hugs, as well as the arguments. As these behaviors fluctuate with age, so do your worries over time. What’s considered typical behavior for a young child may become a sign of concern if it’s still demonstrated as a teenager. Over time, it become more challenging to keep up with your child’s evolving need. How do you help when you see your child struggling emotionally? When is it time to seek help from a therapist? Here are some signs and tips to consider…
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