It can be difficult to always respond to your child in the most effective way. When you’re in a stressful situation, your body acts without thinking. You may act on your emotions and respond in ways that you later regret. However, you can modify your response before you act on impulse by incorporating mindfulness into your parenting. You have the option to react on emotions or respond mindfully. Let’s explore how you can start to integrate mindfulness into your parenting approach in order to reduce stress and maintain a positive parent-child relationship…

Showing Up With Compassion

As parents, it is possible that you’re incredibly hard on yourself; this kind of behavior can be destructive. It is easy to imagine demonstrating compassion for those that you love. However, it’s far more difficult to show compassion towards yourself. The mindfulness practice for self-compassion will help you learn to practice self-compassion in your daily life. Practicing self compassion is one of the best ways to improve your wellness and your mood, as well as strengthen your relationship with your family members. Learn how to practice a self-compassion break in order to show yourself kindness, alleviate stress, and help you cope with the challenges of parenthood…

Parenting Without Judgment

Do you ever find you’re hard on yourself as a parent? Do you tend to assume the worst about yourself when the situation unfolds differently than planned? Judgments are FUEL on emotional fire. Although you need judgments in order to stay safe, negative judgments may impact your self-efficacy and how you view yourself in the parenting role. In Dialectical Behavior Therapy, acting non-judgmentally is essential to avoid mistaking your opinions or emotions as facts. Take a vacation from judgment and parent effectively by adopting a non-judgmental stance. Let’s explore how you can identify your judgments and replace them with a non-judgmental, neutral stance…

Maintaining Your Self-Respect as a Parent

Parenting as we used to know it (pre-pandemic) has radically changed! We are now being challenged with multi-tasking and problem-solving novel situations with no road map or clear answers. Although positive parenting is possible right now, it certainly is challenging! To feel both effective AND simultaneously good about yourself while navigating this challenging time, use the Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skill of FAST to maintain your self-respect as a parent. FAST is helps you keep your self-respect in relationships by honoring your own values and beliefs. Let’s explore how it works…

How to Validate AND Parent your Child

As a parent, it’s important to find a balance between making sure your child feels heard and parenting effectively. This is often easier said than done! It can be challenging to be your child’s friend to count on while maintaining boundaries and structure as a parent. Luckily, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, or DBT, can help! In DBT, building and maintaining healthy relationships is a key component to interpersonal effectiveness. One interpersonal skill, the “GIVE” skill, can help you achieve this parenting balance within your household. Here’s how it works…

Creative Ways to Bond with your Teen During a Pandemic

Do you wish you had a stronger bond with your teen? Although you may be living underneath the same roof as your teen, it may feel as though you’re miles away from them. You may be physically close, yet emotionally distant. This year has been emotionally tolling on most people and your teen is no exception. When you are both under such strain, it can be more challenging than ever to find common ground. You don’t have to let the stress and monotony of a pandemic get in the way of cultivating positive experiences with your child. Consider these three creative ways to reconnect and bond with your teen during the next few months…

Lessons From 2020 to Carry Into 2021

There is no doubt that 2020 has been a year of adjustment. We have learned valuable lessons collectively as a society, and on an individual level as well. Whether they involved finances, social engagement, emotional health, or work, they taught us valuable insights that we may not have otherwise gained during a typical year. As this year begins closing behind us, let’s recognize the valuable lessons learned that we can apply for years to come. Here are three important lessons from 2020 that will be beneficial in 2021…

Three Ways to Cope with This Year’s Virtual Holiday Season

With the holiday season looming, it is becoming increasingly evident that this year’s festivities might not resemble years past. However, with a little extra effort and creativity, a merry holiday season can persevere. Here are three ways to cope with the virtual holiday season...

Action steps, Family, Tips for Your MindEmily HudakNovember 22, 2020holidays, coping, challenges, family, gratitude

Ways to Control the Chaos while Keeping your Cool

Have your emotions felt out of control lately? It’s hard to be your best self during a pandemic. Trying to keep the family calm so that you all get along is a major undertaking—let alone keeping your own emotions in-check. Though it would be nice, you can’t ever have complete control over how you feel. The best you can do is to develop better emotion regulation skills so that you’re not feeling emotionally drained by the end of the day. Here are some DBT-inspired tips and tricks to manage an endless list of to-do’s while maintaining your composure…

How Parents can Promote Patience at Home

Do you get easily frustrated with your family? Maybe it’s the way your kids chew with their mouths open or the way your partner stacks the dishes in the sink that gets on your nerves. These minor bothers can get exacerbated during a pandemic. Your emotions are only heightened with the added stress of health, financial, and social concerns. With so many things to worry about, it’s understandable that the little things might put your emotional state over the edge. One of the best ways to keep your cool during a pandemic is to practice patience. Patience is more than being able to wait for something or someone. It’s also the ability to tolerate unpleasant situations without getting angry or upset (without getting into Emotion Mind, as it’s called in DBT). Parents who are patient are better able to handle daily challenges within the family without losing their cool. Like playing the piano or riding a bike, patience is a learned skill that you can strengthen over time. Here are some ways to cultivate patience…

Easing Your Family's Back-to-School Transition

With the school year starting any day now, many parents and children are understandably anxious. There’s a great deal of uncertainty about what the new school year will look like and how it will compare to expectations. No matter what happens, this start of school will not be “normal.” It requires a different approach than previous years: an approach composed of determination, patience, compassion, and mindfulness. If you’re looking for ways to ease this especially challenging back to school transition for the kids (and for yourself), here are some helpful tips…

Helping your Teen or Tween Beat Summer Boredom

Are you tired of hearing your kids say, “I’m bored!” all of the time? Many teens and tweens are struggling with a common emotion this summer: boredom. Too often, kids respond to boredom with negative pattern behaviors. With time, teens and tweens get stuck in a cycle of negative behavior, in which they immediately go to TikTok or the cookie tin when they feel bored. Luckily, there are just as many positive responses to boredom as negative ones! By creating challenges, trying new activities, and getting creative, your child can have a fun, engaging summer during coronavirus. Here are some ways to help your teen or tween beat that summer boredom…

Action steps, Family, Parenting Techniques, TeenagersEmily ZemanAugust 2, 2020teens, tweens, parenting, boredom, summer

3 Ways to Develop your Child’s Healthy Independence

As your child seeks independence, you may be asking yourself "What's the right balance?" Creating more independence is often a topic in family therapy and in therapy with teens. For parents, the struggle lies in giving your children enough space to make mistakes that they can learn from AND not so much space that it risks your child getting seriously hurt. It’s not easy to find middle ground between your child’s needs to be independent and venture out and your need to keep your child forever safe and close. So how do you strike a balance? Where is the line between creating independence and promoting safety? Here are 3 tips on how to approach this topic in your family discussions…

Resolving Family Conflicts with VALIDATE

Are you often at odds with your kids, partner, or other people in your quarantine bubble? Disagreements during already stressful times can make everyday life difficult for everyone. With continuous conflict caused by being around each other all of the time, your family may feel out of touch, tense, or distant. How can you strengthen your family relationships, reduce conflict, and feel happier? Next time you encounter conflict, give the VALIDATE skill a try! VALIDATE helps you validate others; you verbally recognize how they are feeling in order to reach a mutual understanding and find a solution. It’s perfect for families because it encourages open, honest communication, allowing family members to connect on a deeper level. Let’s explore how VALIDATE can help your family…

How to Effectively Ask Your Kids to do What You Want

Do you find yourself asking your kids to do something 4 or 5 times before you finally give in, give up, and do it yourself? Sometimes, it can seem like your kids don’t care about the consequences of following through on daily tasks, or that they don’t care to listen to what you have to say. Yet ignoring your requests has impacts on you and the whole family. It’s one of every parent’s greatest dilemmas: How do you get your kids to do what you want? Try using the DEARMAN skill. DEARMAN is a fantastic DBT skill that improves communication and helps you get what you want—without yelling, whining, or conflicts. It’s an acronym with tips and techniques to make requests. Let’s explore how it works with a real-life example…

3 Ways to Help your Family Transition to a New Normal

As quarantine measures relax and things begin transitioning back to a “new normal,” it may be time for your family to begin painting a picture of what this transition could look like. We have been through a total of 3 massive and immediate changes in less than 4 months, which means that our brains have been working overtime to adjust time and time again. That’s a lot to cope with! Therefore, it’s understandable if you’re feeling hesitant, confused, or unsure about how to proceed. Here are 3 ways you can help your families (and your minds) prepare to transition to your “new normal” in the weeks ahead…

3 Ways to be a More Effective Parent during COVID-19

As parents, we all have unique ideals and expectations of the experience of raising our kids. We set schedules, we create routines and we teach lessons to instill those ideals in our children as we try to meet our own. So, how do we manage when our children change, when we change, and when life changes? It’s challenging to parent your children the same way that you were months ago, before the pandemic began. Therefore, it is crucial that we adapt to changing circumstances. How can we maintain a flexible stance with our parenting and create a calmer home environment? Here are 3 ways to help you become a more effective parenting during this crisis…

Co-Parenting During Quarantine: Strategies for Success

Co-parenting means working together with your partner, or even ex-partner, for the greater good of your children. Even the most well-adjusted co-parenting teams encounter obstacles from one day to the next. Now with the added stressor of COVID-19, those struggles can intensify or be different from before quarantine. You may want to re-evaluate and revise your co-parenting strategies to meet new needs. Here are some tips that might help your co-parenting right now…

Upgrade Your Family Time, When Family Time is All You Have

Under normal circumstances, the usual progression of the day usually goes something like this: Wake up, eat breakfast, drop the kids off at school, go to work, kids travel home from school, get off work, cook dinner, eat, sleep, repeat. This routine means that everyone is busy, and it also makes family time precious. Now what happens when that family time became so frequent that work, school, eating, and alone time merge together? Many families may be finding this time tricky to navigate. Your home may be feeling very close now that everyone is in the same space for extended periods of time. For some, your boundaries may be blurring and your schedule may be more lax. Parents: let’s take a look at the ways you can help your entire family upgrade your family time, when family time is all you have…

Teen Anxiety and Social Distancing

In the last few weeks since schools have closed and many businesses have begun working remotely, we have heard from many parents of teens with pre-existing social anxiety and/or school refusal, that their teens are thriving while sheltering in place. Whereas we hear that other parents are left at a loss, unsure how to help their teens who feel tortured from the lack of social interaction. No matter which end of the spectrum your child falls on, social distancing is a major concern for many parents. Parents are worried about the long-term effects of social distancing on their already distanced kids. How can you help your teen through this turbulent time? Here are some suggestions…

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